I don’t know who you are, but I don’t like you already.

I don’t know who you are, but I don’t like you already.

One of my jobs is insanely cool. It’s the bring  your kids to work, get your shit done, and have a good time doing it type of place. It’s seriously THE perfect place to start my day. It’s also right across the street from the bank I go to on the daily, so I take the office kids to the bank with me so they can play with the toys, get a treat, and more importantly, give their moms a few minutes of respite. “I like going to the bank. You give them money, and they give me suckers,” said one of the kids a few years ago. See, it works for everyone. It’s something they learn early too, like before they can even talk early.

Today as I was getting ready to leave, the almost 1-year-old was the only one at the office. She started reaching simultaneously for me and the door, while smacking her lips. That’s baby talk for “I want strangers to tell me I’m pretty and give me a sucker!”

As we loaded up and walked across the street, she got more excited the closer we got to that toddler treat heaven. She was smacking her lips, pointing to the counter, and walking around like she owned the place, pausing to let people admire her from time to time. She was particularly intrigued with the lady next to me, and while the sweet old woman proclaimed “All babies just love me,” I thought to myself “That’s the window we usually go to and she can see the basket of suckers.” I didn’t want to burst her bubble though, so I just smiled, nodded my head, and picked up my tiny banking partner when she realized that woman wasn’t going to grab her the sucker she so desperately wanted and walked back to me with her arms up.

I finished my business and grabbed a sucker, holding it just tight enough that little miss couldn’t pull it out of my hand and eat it wrapper and all. As we were getting ready to walk out the door, the lady in our usual money/sucker exchange location said “Oh, you better see what Grandma got you.”

Grandma?! Are you freaking kidding me?! Now I wish I had burst her bubble and told her the kid just wanted the suckers and didn’t care about the person in the way of them. Grandma?! I don’t even know who this lady is, but I know I don’t like her…



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